waiting and waiting and

leaving for thailand and cambodia tomorrow; i realized a couple of days ago that this is like my only ... pleasure vacation i've ever taken! besides spring breaks to pretty close places for pretty short periods of time. the only other places i've ever gone have been fairly structured study abroad type places. so i'm a little bit worried and nervous about even going! also i'm flying out by myself, maybe that has something to do with it. and i'm really fat. how did i gain so much weight in such a short amount of time? and like, while i was not eating a lot of bad stuff, too.

okay. i decided to stop dumbing myself down, also, and maybe that will become apparent over the next few months. but like, we'll see, because i'm pretty dumb. so dumb that i have these really specific things that i want out of my trip. and they are strappy leather sandals with no heel and breezy linen caftans. i really don't think the thai wear caftans, but we'll see how it all works out. next stop morocco, i guess. so eileen and i will be going on an intrepid tour to thailand and then depending on things turn out, i will go do some beach-y stuff and then some wat-ty stuff. it is really hard to figure out what to even expect, but i guess by roughly this time tomorrow i'll be well on my way!

now i'm waiting on duncan to call; he has my malaria meds and my plane ticket. that whole story isn't even worth telling. i should also start packing; this trip will also be notable for being my first "backpack"-y trip ever! because i've never had a Backpack before. and finally, i bought these amazing shoes. okay, two pairs of amazing shoes. i should really take a picture, but i'm feeling lazy. what else is new. sometimes i disgust myself so much it becomes completely normal.